Texas

This week we are playing Rice; for those of you who don't own a globe, Rice is in Houston, Texas. Going to Texas can only mean one thing, cowboys. I have wanted to be a cowboy for all 23 years of my life and I do not see that changing any time soon.
Texas has always sparked my interest because I am big into tradition, and the Texas people have always been known as a proud people. I have been to Texas (San Antonio) once before to watch my brother, Adam, play in the Sweet 16/Elite 8 for Michigan State in 2003. Sadly, from what I could see San Antonio was exceptionally modern for Texas. I imagine Houston to be like the Old West in the movies full of saloons, general stores and hitchin' posts. If this is not what present day Houston, Texas is like then I have been lied to and I'm glad we are only there for one night. If Houston is anything like what I described, there is a 100% chance I will elect to stay and get back to my wranglin' roots. I belong in boots, hat, skinny jeans, a duster and two six shooters.
I do have some questions of concern about our game in the great state of Texas:

1. Texas is pretty dry, is there going to be enough water for us? I've heard it is supposed to be hot.
2. What are the chances of a group of outlaws storming the field and looting the fans? If it is anything above 75% I'm out.
3. If everything really is bigger in Texas, shouldn't we be practicing with bigger balls this week? Is the field going to be any bigger? Hope not.
4. Why do horses wear shoes? Do horses wear socks? Is anybody listening to me?

Go ahead and act like you've never worried about this stuff.